It’s hard to believe that Star Trek is over 40 now, middle-aged and carrying a lot of weight. My story as a fan is a long and faithful one that began at the age of 10 kicking off with the original series/animated series and movies, continued with TNG and ended with the finale of the wonderful and criminally underrated, “Deep Space Nine.” The original series and their films captured the very best of what Trek represents, using science-fiction to explore the issues of the day, analyze our darker angels and delve into humanities complicated psyche. The Next Generation started off shaky, but gradually evolved into a proper sequel series and it’s spin-off, “Deep Space Nine” took a slightly darker route and surpassed TNG in quality of stories and overall dramatic weight. Then the universe began to slowly implode as the Trek franchise began to show its cracks in 1995, with the premiere of “Star Trek: Voyager.” Overflowing with tons of promise, the series had an excellent premise that found a group of Starfleet officers chasing Ma`que rebels into the uncharted area of the galaxy known as the “Badlands.” During their pursuit, they became stranded in the Gamma Quadrant and engage an alien force known as “The Caretaker,” and soon discover it would take 75 light years of maximum light speed to return to Federation space. A cool concept indeed, the USS Starship Voyager stranded in parts unknown left to fend for itself. A perfect opportunity was at hand to actually explore strange new worlds and boldly go inside the psychology of the various crew members and the effects of isolation and dealing with people you “hate” in cramped quarters so far from home.
A great recipe for conflict and tense drama, you say? Sure, but not here. Nothing ever changed for this crew. The Ma`que/Starfleet rift was barely touched on after the premiere episode and constantly tried to tidy up any on-going conflict amongst the crew. How about a mutiny instigated by The Ma`que crew? Cool, right? Damn right, but not on this show. The perfect opportunity to explore the Federation’s sometimes misguided polices and mistakes were traded in for fake, sticky sentiment, turning everyone into shiny happy people. The Dirty Dozen in space was reduced to Up with People, only a tad more annoying. Captain Katherine Janeway (Kate Mulgrew; originally given to French actress, Genevieve Bujold, who quit after three days of a hectic schedule), the first female Captain to anchor a series was a great idea, except she was an unmitigated jerk. Always played like nails-on-a-chalkboard as Mulgrew spoke with a slight nasal whine. Her performance varied from tolerable to angry, humorless, shrieking harpy. There was no nuance with her, one side or the other, none of the interesting gray area television characters get to explore. Not once was she ever portrayed as decent, but flawed, instead she was always in the extreme by never, ever making a mistake. The supporting cast, save for the Vulcan Tuvok, (Tim Russ) were a pack of boring whussies. The first seen Native American, Chakotay, (Robert Beltran) was the worst character of them all speaking one lame platitude after another. His on-going “love” storyline with Janeway was as contrived, dull and unbelievable as any tripe pushed out by Lifetime television. The series only other interesting character was hologram Doctor played by Robert Picardo. In an effort to boast sagging ratings, some T & A was added to the mix in season three with the bug-eyed, sorta sexy Jerri Ryan as former Borg 7 of 9, who struggled to return to her human ways after years in the Borg collective. An interesting character, but her inner conflict was trivialized and never really fully realized, but at least her skin-tight costume was exciting. As much potential the series held, it was squandered at every turn and watching it off and on for seven years, was one long exasperating experience. None of the storylines strayed too far out of the formulaic, the characters never changed and the series hardly ever used its sci-fi premise to explore current day issues to the degree of the original series. The actors’ annoyance factor was always a perplexing canard to get around, yet ultimately it was a waste of time as it was retained and carried through until the series finale when the crew finally reached earth resulting in one of the worst Deus ex machina moments, coming home- the credits roll! No reactions from a relieved and joyous crew, no tears from the family members waiting for them on Earth. Think of it as soon as the Death Star explodes in Star Wars, roll credits! No reactions, no ceremony. That sums the show up perfectly for me; cut to the chase, who cares about character drama or human interaction? The series was never interested in telling good dramatic stories with interesting flawed characters with arcs that stretch over several episodes/seasons, but standard vanilla sci-fi schlock that never resonated or added up to much after seven seasons on the air. I can’t think of more than one episode that was not a dull piece of crap and just when you thought it couldn’t get worse, it did. Debuting on the UPN network, 2001, Enterprise was cashing in on the Star Wars prequel craze at the time and introduced the very first crew of the Enterprise, with a just the barely established Federation. An interesting idea, I guess, but unlike the original series, “Enterprise” was trapped in a bubble, barely acknowledging the current state of things, sure we got the veiled 9/11 storyline, but it had zero impact since they were a brand new race of hostile aliens and not the usual far more interesting suspects of Romulans & Klingon. Enterprise was a fucked-from-birth being set a century before Kirk, yet its technology; phasers, transporters, shuttlecrafts, looked far more advanced. Of course the Vulcan babe, T’Pol, was easy on the eyes, but a contradictory character since I don’t recall Vulcan females stripping and acting like the ship’s hooker. Whatever happened to their edict of sex only every seven years? Up yours! Continuity! After season two, the fans were disgusted as they realized what a miserable creative strangle-hold overseer, Rick Berman and lap-dog and alleged writer, Brannon Braga exerted over the franchise. The two slowly killed Trek by playing it safe and not shaking things up dramatically. Its biggest sin was not using society to tell compelling, intelligent, pertinent, stories that dealt with hot-button issues of the day; Berman’s philosophy was Political Correctness all the way- no social allegories for his shows! Eventually, Trek became infuriating and phony because no matter what dire circumstance the characters fond themselves in, by episodes end, it was back to status quo with the characters having amnesia the very next week. Having no residual effects from a traumatic experience made the characters look paper thin and extremely dumb and came off looking just a little too neat and perfect. The first two seasons of TNG was nearly ruined with this unrealistic and boring approach until Roddenberry let go of the reins and the new producers dumped the“kumbiah” mentality. “Deep Space Nine”, the best since the original, had zero involvement from Roddenberry, Berman & Braga, thus escaped their hack sensibilities and instead embraced humanities darker side making for some outstanding character/story arcs and drama. The episodic format was abused in Trek’s latter series, it worked for TOS and TNG most of the time and even for DS9, yet the latter gradually dropped the episodic format and integrated several plotlines that lasted for several seasons, especially in its later years with the war story consuming the series final two and half seasons. Voyager had an infamously bad ending to an impressive two-part episode that put the ship and the characters through the ringer, but changed everything back with a time warp and memory wipe rendering the previous two hours a complete waste of time. The characters should have, but didn’t evolve. From the point of view of a wanna be struggling writer, I could not think of a lazier, duller scenario than characters who never learn or evolve from their many adventures. Even though Enterprise bounced back somewhat in the last two seasons, the damage was done, Trek had become irrelevant. Add to the mix the box-office failure of 2002’s “Star Trek: Nemesis,” fans were tired of the same old thing and for the first time, the creators killed Trek, not the network goons. When the cancellation of Enterprise was announced in 2005, fan sentiment was generally the same-good! GO AWAY! Let it rest for awhile. Air it out, get the stink of Rick Berman and Brannon Braga out of the house and leave it alone until someone with some fresh ideas comes along. Apparently, JJ Abrams, creator/writer of “Lost/Alias”, became the new Fabreeze since he was anointed the new King of the Trek Universe in 2006 with a new Trek film in the works coming Christmas 2008- as Spock was so often fond of saying, “There are always possibilities.” After Enterprise’s demise, I was expecting a lengthy hiatus that would hopefully see the end of B &B ruinous tenure, which thank Kirk, did happen, but what Abrams did afterwards is something I never thought I would see again- Abrams convinced the legendary Leonard Nimoy to return as Spock! DAMN RIGHT! As he is my favorite Trek character this sent me into little girl squeals of delight but what about Kirk? I’ve read some disappointing blurbs in the press by Shatner who has said he’s not in the upcoming film yet, Abrams and Nimoy both said they are working on a way to bring Shatner back and I really hope so as it would be a one helluva a kick and increase the film’s gross by almost double. The best part is, the film is NOT a reboot, remake or re-imagining of any kind, which frankly, I’m sick to death of. Before people play the but-it-worked-for-Battlestar Galactica card, it’s not the same thing. Trek has a long history of success and doesn’t need a redo, despite Berman’s best efforts to undermine it. I would be bitching about BSG as well, (in fact I did until I got my head out of my ass!) but Ronald Moore has managed to create one helluva show that has been exceeding all expectations, especially my own. Plus, it remade a show that ran for two seasons, left the air nearly thirty years ago and was a cult show at best, seen only by the hard-core sci-fi geeks, so again, not the same thing. Others will say, you forgot James Bond! Superman! Batman! Again, NOT the same thing. Those characters are ALL bigger than the actor who plays them, which is why they’ve survived for decades and the actors are mostly forgotten. As in Trek’s case, Shatner, Nimoy created those characters and have been linked to them for last 40 plus years and are just as iconic as their characters. That is an impossible thing to forget and would be pointless and stupid to do anything close to a remake. When they die, the first thing mentioned will be “Best know for their stint on the original Star Trek” series of the 1960’s”…So for me, the idea of having some shitty young actor to come and “re-image” anything that’s been done before is not only redundant and lazy, but insulting. I can just see some H-town hotshot getting the bright idea of skewing to the “Urban” crowd with promos touting Snoop Dog IS James T. Kirk or Wanda Sykes IS Lt. Nyoto Uhura and introducing 50 Cent as Khan Noonian Sign! Uh, NO THANKS. Hollywood’s track record for taking an established property and screwing with it until it’s meaningless and unrecognizable is legendary and aggressive- see the Sci-Fi Channel’s series of “Flash Gordon” for further awful evidence. Personally, I would have told Abrams to just move forward in time. Maybe put the Federation in some sort of dire situation, (a collapse perhaps?) pick some crew members from The Next Generation, (Riker, LaForge and Troi?) and Deep Space 9(O’Brien, Bashir, Worf, Dax, Garak) and run with it. People moan about the “castrating continuity”- only if you are a shitty writer would such a thing become a hindrance. Why would it become a hindrance when all you have to do is move forward or in this case, move sideways? I love Star Trek because of its long and enduring history/continuity. I also love that it’s not accessible to everyone. The people bitching about the continuity are the ones who were never fans to begin with so they can cram it with walnuts. Which brings up another trend that pisses me off is this insane notion of trying to have Trek reach out to the so-called masses. WHY? This show will never appeal to the masses; people like my parents, rednecks or the state of Kansas. I challenge anyone to find me more than five women that like this stuff, exceptions of course, but find me five really attractive women, not the fat, creepy Goth girls with low self-esteem; if anyone can, I’ll eat a handful of live worms. My point is this show is designed for a select audience, I know most people hate that, but it’s true and no matter how the studio screwheads market it, Trek is for the sci-fi geeks only. As it should be, let the jock-sniffers, the fickle-stupid teenagers and hobbit lickers stay home, I want my Trek with plenty of spaceships, explosions and philosophical pontification and not watered down because of morons unable to do their homework and doing something as dumb as walking in cold to Trek movie. The casual viewer is not be counted on in any circumstance because it’s their capricious choices that constantly kill quality programs. The evidence that Trek did reach out to the masses for one brief shining moment is allegedly supported by “Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home”, cracking $100 million- HORSE SQUEEZE! Never did and still don’t buy it. “ST: The Motion” cracked that number yet no one claimed it was being seen by the regular masses, it wasn’t, it was seen and meant for the fans who worked diligently to help in it’s revival and that’s the way it should be. Not everyone is going to like the same things so let’s accept that and move on. “Trek IV” grossed that amount because it was good and was tons of fun. Also too, it was the first Trek film released at Christmas, the geeks had more time off and it had very little competition. I find it extremely hard to believe that Joe Six-pack movie-goer, wanting to go to the movies, having never seen nor been a fan Star Trek would suddenly want to take his darling wife Bertha out to see a Star Trek movie, let alone one with Part 4 in the title. Do they read a book by starting with chapter 4? Give me a Nell Carter- sized break! This is for Sci-fi/Trek fans only- if you aren’t a fan STAY HOME! So now we look to the future with Abrams at the helm. What he is cooking up has been largely secretive until a few weeks ago that saw the release of a major plot synopsis. According to several movie sites, most notably Chud.com and Aint-it-cool features Leonard Nimoy returning as old Spock, who shares his role with Zachary Quinto who plays a younger Spock in an epic story that spans several centuries beginning with this fascinating premise. Per Aint-it-cool.com & Chud.com: “Picture an incident that throws a group of Romulans back in time. Picture that group of Romulans figuring out where they are in the timeline, then deciding to take advantage of the accident to kill someone’s father, to erase them from the timeline before they exist, thereby changing the entire Trek universe as a result. Who would you erase? Whose erasure would leave the biggest hole in the Trek universe is the question you should be asking. Who else, of course, but James T. Kirk? If Spock were in a position to change that incident back, and then in a position to guard that timeline and make sure things happen the way they’re supposed to, it creates... ... well, what does it create? Because evidently the plan is to use this second timeline as a way of rebooting without erasing or ignoring canon. These new voyages of the Enterprise, they’re taking place in whatever timeline starts with this story. Maybe this timeline features dramatic differences. Like... say... if Vulcan were to be blown up. If the Vulcans in the series were suddenly the last of their kind, alone in the universe, it would change who they are and maybe even redefine their strict rejection of emotion in favor of logic." Pretty cool, eh? The underlined part is my favorite as the remake is not going to happen yet it allows them to move forward in Kirk’s time without remaking anything from that classic era. I would hope that Abrams takes it a step further and sees this as perfect way to stick Shatner in the flick and rescue Kirk from his lame demise in “Generations.” (*Geek Mode engaged* If they are serious about bringing back Kirk- his “echo” is still in the “Nexus”, go get him, JJ!) We have seen mentions of a young Kirk being at the helm, but what exactly is his command style going to be like? The Kirk/Shatner icon is something that is definitely a product of its time, the proactive 60’s problem solver, shoot first, and ask questions later type may look like an unintended parody of the original series. There’s a happy middle ground to take. No one expects a mimic of Shatner, but a true representation of who and what Kirk is all about. A word of caution to Abrams, who would be very much a fool if he didn’t portray Kirk the way he is, not how he should be today, meaning: a pussified, mealy-mouthed, hand-wringing crybaby. I’m thinking Kirk’s fuck it, fight it or kill it philosophy is the only way to go. The fans love the Cap’n’s over-the-top heroics and would expect nothing else. Also too, I know, many may be groaning about time travel being used, saying it’s a lazy conceit, but I say, no, at least not for Trek who has an outstanding track record of using this as the perfect Mcguffin. From the original series we have “City on the Edge of Forever”, “Return to Tomorrow”, and “Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home”, TNG has the outstanding “Yesterday’s Enterprise” and Deep Space Nine in honoring Trek’s 30th birthday, gave us “Trials and Tribble-ations.” I don’t recall Voyager using it, Enterprise had one that involved Nazis and WWII, was reasonably good for that show at least. I say embrace it; let’s see what JJ Abrams has in store for us. If the time travel stuff bothers you, hit the bricks. Anyone who bitches about this apparently never watched the series with any regularity and therefore has no business saying one negative word. The kid may pull it off and bring excitement and relevancy to Star Trek again, something lost on its previous owners. Trek has never been just an entertainment franchise for me, but a cultural institution that shows us through the lens of science-fiction, what we are capable of and what we need to overcome. Our potential was shown to us and it didn't suck and through some collective cooperation, we could accomplish whatever we sent our minds to. This new film could very well suck to high heaven if anything is amiss and get laughed off the screen, but I seriously doubt it. It’s been over twenty years since Trek has had a new boss so it will be interesting how audiences and fans embrace this unique take and to see if Abrams is as clever as he thinks he is. I will give JJ one thing, he does appear to be a passionate respectful, fan; that alone is something Rick Berman never was as he freely admitted to having never seen any incarnation of “Star Trek” when he was hired by Gene Roddenberry in 1986. I’m excited as hell as the cast is hired and the movie is ready to shoot. Expectations will remain in check as I will do exactly what I did with the Star Wars prequels and remain cautiously optimistic, (it worked with them!) just because that’s the logical thing to do-fascinating. P. S. Abrams, if you can hear me, please don’t be afraid to use the “Mirror Universe” and all its crazy possibilities. Throw The Shat a big huge bone and stick Kirk in the film! Good Luck, Dan